Kimmi's Dos and Don'ts: Online dating edition

Okay, for lack of anything better to do right now, I thought I might... share some pearls of wisdom that I have gathered to the masses. I guess the best way to do that is with *dramatic music* a series! Yes, I have come up with my own blog series. Please, hold your applause, just send cash.

The topic for my first Kimmi's Dos and Don'ts? Online dating. Specifically: MySpace dating. I suppose this could also apply to Facebook, but since most of my experience has been on MySpace, we'll talk in terms of that specific social networking site.

I'm kind of picky, that's no real surprise to people who know me, or who have talked to me after a few moments. When I talk to a guy I want to actually talk to him. I want to know things about him. His goals in life, his hobbies, what he likes, what he dislikes, music, movies, books, ect. I want to get to know the guy I am talking to. I want to know if there is anything there to grow upon. Same thing as with a first date. I want to get to know you, I want to have a conversation.

Below are some of the many opening lines that I have recieved from guys who intend on hitting on me.

1. "Hey sexy. I think your hot. Want 2 chat"
Amazingly, guys, this is not a viable pick up line. You think I'm attractive, okay, thats fine. Calling me "sexy" without even knowing me? My feminisim alarm goes off and I automatically assume that you want a booty call, or that you are obsessed with physical attributes. For me, thats a no go. Secondly, as an English major, my mind automatically rejects the message. It drives me NUTS! The punctuation, the "2" instead of "to", it makes me want to scream. I know I'm not perfect with my grammar and such, but I at least TRY. It is laziness... that's all it is. So no. I dont want 2 chat.

2. "Hey hottie. I luv BBW. Your beautiful. txt me if you want to talk more."
Again. I reject the obsession with physical attributes. And I do not want to be called a "BBW". I'm a person. I'm a woman. I'm a pluse size woman. But I do not want to be classifed as a "BBW". Again, calling me hottie? You don't even know me. And I don't randomly txt guys. Especially if they live in say... Ohio.

3. "What up. Hit me back if you want to know more."
This says "Hey! I'm wasting your time! I'm going to tell you what to do and I don't even know you! I'm even too lazy to even TRY and say something that might start a conversation."
I'm not going to talk to someone who doesn't want to tell me at least something about themselves.

I have to say, I feel that if you are interested in someone that you meet on MySpace, Facebook, whatever, you should attempt to be polite. Give a small introduction, comment on something that you found interesting on my/whoever's profile, give SOMETHING so that a conversation can take place. I want to know about YOU. I want to know WHY you took the time to message me in the first place. I want to know what we have in COMMON.

Throw me a bone, guys, think before you message someone. You're more likely to get a response and you increase your chance of actually getting somewhere with whoever you're intrested in.